Roller Coaster Ride with My Guy

So, after having whined and complained, I started feeling pretty guilty. I probably shouldn't blog when I'm tired and frustrated! ; ) Sorry!

Good news, though! My wonderful hubby has taken the D-night shift for the last two days. While I still woke up at 2:45 on my own (apparently I now have an internal alarm for that time), I was able to get some wonderfully restful sleep...Praise the Lord! It's amazing how your outlook changes after some good quality rest. What a roller coaster ride this whole D-life is.

Last Sunday, while at church, Joyful Monkey was falling asleep during worship. That seemed a bit odd, but we had enjoyed a full week and I could see how she would be tired. I didn't want to overreact, but we were a bit concerned. My hubby was like, what the heck...let's just check her to be sure! We were SHOCKED when the meter read "HIGH". We have never before had a reading like that. Had her pump been working? Yes! Her numbers were good all night and before breakfast. Was it kinked or not correctly attached? Nope; everything looked good on inspection. Did her morning bolus go through? Yup! What was going on? Her breakfast was a typical breakfast that she has had many times before. It didn't make sense. However, we needed a plan. We had just changed the set the day before and didn't want to go that route until we knew what was going on. So, we grabbed a syringe and the Novolog to give a correction shot.

We were pretty surprised at how apprehensive JM was to have a shot again. She hadn't had one since we started the pump in July. And she wasn't feeling good...after all, she was over 600! Thankfully it only took a little bit of coaxing. We went to the church library for our "recovery" time. While there, JM and I invented a great game of hair band hockey. The long table made a great "air" hockey table for her hair band. While we passed our time playing hair band hockey in the church library (That is what the church library is for, isn't it?), her numbers steadily dropped.

The rest of the day was uneventful and the pump and set worked perfectly fine. I still have NO CLUE what spiked her that morning. But I am grateful for an ever-persistent husband! In not wanting to overreact, I would have let that BG go.

Just this morning in Sunday School, it was mentioned how having a child with an illness can be a source of relationship stress in a marriage because the wife's main focus becomes the ill child instead of her husband. I am so blessed that my husband and I team up for Joyful Monkey's care. Rather than causing stress in our marriage, I believe it has bonded us all the more. Thank you Lord for the guy you put in the seat next to me on this crazy roller coaster ride!

Burnout

I'm sure that everyone who deals with a T1D, or is a T1D, suffers from this periodically. I'm just tired of it! It's not even that I am wondering "Why?" or feeling sorry for "us". I'm too tired to even feel emotion about it. All I know is that I want a full night's sleep free of worry.

My hubby and I take turns getting up with Joyful Monkey to check BG levels. The problem lies in the fact that even when it's not my turn, I wake up wondering if she was indeed checked and what her number was. He's not getting much sleep either. Little sleep makes for a less-than-ideal household. (My house is a wreck as I just feel too tired to deal with it right now.)

The ultra sad thing is that here I am complaining and I'm not even the one having my finger poked or putting infusion sets on my body or feeling the physical tolls of varying sugar levels. Joyful Monkey will never have a "break" from this. Throughout my life, I'm sure I will have short stints of a D break. This line of thought just makes me more discouraged and frustrated with myself...it's a vicious cycle. I know that the Lord will give me the strength; I just wish I could store some up so I don't have to feel so drained!

So for now, I'm just dreaming about what life will be like when a cure is found (when my thoughts are coherent, that is)...

What do you do when D burnout hits?